Why bad things happen to good people.

On the problem of evil in our lives…

First off, my apologies for this being a few days late. My regular Thursday letter will come out as usual.

(I promise I’ll make it up to you next week with an extra piece…)

Alex and I were on a Christmas trip with the boys and the day we came back we found ourselves in a sea of trials in areas all over the map (the least of which a hospital stay), laying waste to the discernment we’d done while gone.

Ironic enough because Alex and I find ourselves in these positions often (both in previous lives and together): life calms down, we get excited and make plans, life falls apart.

It’s easy to think we’re just doing things wrong.

Maybe. Or maybe there’s a reason or a secret very few get let in on. One that explains why bad things happen to good people.

I mean, like you I’m sure, we’re just trying to do the best we can for our marriage, our family, our kids, and everything in between - all why trying to stay in a state of grace, frequenting the Sacraments, praying our rosary, catechizing and teaching our kids how to be good people (amidst their own grief and trauma), working hard, making mistakes, and staying on the narrow way.

So, why does life have to be so hard? Why can’t being a good person and trying to do good things be rewarded?

The thoughts behind this letter…

The plan for this letter materialized after hearing of the passing of my friend, Jessica Hanna, from breast cancer last week. Many of you may have followed her story. And in the wake of her passing, I reflected on my prayers for her as well as my prayers for Michael, when he was sick with brain cancer.

God, give her a miracle! God, give him a miracle!

No miracle came. Only death. Suffering. Grief. Pain.

I’m sure you can look at your life, too, and question why all the suffering. Why this or that or why do bad things happen to little kids or why is it that the more faithful we seem to get the more that seems to go wrong?

It’s a question I’ve wrestled with for years. In anger and confusion I have yelled to the Lord and at the Lord and I often heard silence in response. But when I began to soften my heart and allow grace to penetrate the innermost parts, the answers came. Not fully and completely (for those will only be known in heaven), but answers that changed me. Answers that became moments of grace and enlightenment and joy when all the new trials came and still come.

This problem of evil is one of the greatest objections to the existence of God. It is an overwhelming test of faith. And I can see why. For it takes a willingness to be open to hearing how our sufferings are not only justified but also necessary. It takes humility to flip the script on its head and ask questions such as, “who’s to say we are good people?” and “who’s to say suffering is all bad?”

With that being said, I remember the moment when I was struck with the truth that suffering is and can be the means to everything I’d ever wanted…