Join me this Lent.

How I'm using Lent to finally tackle what's standing in the way to greater holiness, while striving to become a better wife and mom along the way. Plus, what Lent will be like around here.

For the past decade, my life has mirrored Lent in all her suffering and glory.

Deaths, literal and figurative. Resurrection in ways I never expected.

And since life was often Lent, I put my foot down in the face of God asking me to give up more in the actual season that is Lent.

Some of it was stubbornness, part of it was my inability to do more. (And God was gentle with me in the process.)

But now I find myself in an odd yet peaceful place of healing. Peace. Clarity in who I am and why I do what I do. (And God is now calling me out of myself.)

And because of this peace and healing, I am finally ready to do more. Well, maybe not more, but what needs to be done. I am finally ready to let go of and root out those deep seeded habits and choices that are keeping me from union with God, from leveling up in life, from the plans God has in store for me for this life and the next.

I’m EXCITED for Lent.

I am actually excited for this season to come. I have been fighting against certain habits that have plagued me for years - escapes and distractions that I fall back on when life gets hard. I’ve been wrestling with my inability to do it on my own, to give up that which stands in the way of so much more. And these things stand in the way not because they’re utterly sinful (because in a lot of ways these habits are not), but because they prevent me from detaching even further. They prevent me from loving as best as I can. And if you read my one New Year’s resolution for this year and the ones to come, love is what I want to grow in until the day I die.

Now I see clearly how these attachments and habits are holding me down. They get in the way of what I need to do for my husband and kids, even though no one hardly notices but me (well, Alex notices, too). They are my way of controlling things. They prevent me from fully trusting God. Because I’m still skeptical…As much as I love Him, as much as I’ve given Him and allowed Him to do in my life, I still fear He will take more…and more and more. So, I’ve been clutching my proverbial apple.

No more.

I see what’s on the other side of letting go. And it’s beautiful.

But between now and then it will be a battle. One I wasn’t prepared for until now, and yet one I’m ready to embark upon. My excitement and readiness will give way to temptation and weariness. And I have to be ready to face it. Not just on my own, but with God as my helper.

It is my hope that, come Easter, these habits will surrender to the detachment and trust that will replace them. It is my hope that, come Easter, I will be a new creation - putting to death the old and rising with the new, all with Christ.

I’m sure you can see yourself in all that, too. There are things you’re holding on to, things you are doing, whether big or small, that are getting in the way. We justify them, we cling to them, we make excuses in our failures of rooting them out. But I’m here to tell you that we have to let go, we have to keep letting go of everything that is not Him. Because everything else passes way…and He will be all that’s left. I’ve learned that one the hard way.

Three things to focus on this Lent.

I heard the most beautiful homily on Lent yesterday from one of our priests. He spoke of the 3 considerations of Lent that the Church gives us in the days and weeks preceding Ash Wednesday in both the liturgy (Mass) and the Divine Office (prayers of the Church).

These three things should guide our Lent, both the Lenten season and the Lent that is life. I want to share them with you because they have mirrored what God has been whispering in my own life until I heard them.

1. God is our strength, our only strength. If there is one thing I know about life it is that the only strength we truly have is from God. Life has broken me, God has let life break me. And it’s to show that His power is made manifest in my weakness. Just as St. Paul spoke of last week in the Sexagesima Sunday Epistle. The Church reminds us that Lent (or life) will not be fruitful or “successful” without God’s help and assistance, without His grace. For His grace is the only thing that can break us from bad habits, it is the only thing that can sustain us in times of mortification, penance, and trial, it is the only thing we can rely on. If we count on our will alone, we will either become prideful or become despairing (because we’ll run into things too difficult to face). As I attempt to detach and let go this Lent, I won’t be able to do it alone. I will have to seek His help every day in prayer, I will have to rely on His grace to get me over the hills of temptation and weariness. Perseverance will definitely be this prayer.

   
   In life, as well, we won’t be able to make it through without His help. So, let’s practice leaning on God this Lent so we can lean on Him in life, too.
   

2. The only aim is CHARITY. As I wrote at the beginning of this year, I have come to see that everything that happens in our life, good or bad, is allowed by God in order to have us grow in LOVE. As 1 Corinthians 13:1-13 said in yesterday’s Quinquagesima Sunday Epistle, it doesn’t matter what incredible things we do or become in life unless we possess and live charity. We could do every single penance under the sun, we could fast for 40 days, go to Mass every day, and speak about God all the time but if we don’t have charity, it means nothing. It profits nothing. God is reminding us that LOVE IS IT. And forgiveness, patience, meekness, kindness, self-control, among other things, is how we live love in this life. That means that we have to orient our habits to being able to love better. And since I have some habits that are getting in the way of loving better, those are what I want to work on and tackle this Lent.
   

3. Easter is the end, Resurrection is everything! I wrote about this a while ago, too. How God spoke to me of actual literal Resurrection in my life. About how, after learning how to love, we must embrace what this life is all about: HEAVEN WITH GOD FOREVER AND EVER! Easter is coming, in fact the Easter season is longer than Lent. The Church again reminds us that, if we persevere in love, Heaven is waiting! And God is waiting for you and I to come join Him after this life, should we persevere in His grace. We can have a taste of it on earth through the little (and sometimes big) Resurrections He has in store for us. My own life has been resurrected and while there is still struggle, trial, challenges, and suffering (a lot of it), I have tasted and seen the goodness of the Lord. And I want to tell you that it’s all worth it…Easter is so sweet.

The Church also give us three means to do these three things: prayer, fasting, and almsgiving. Practical means to live this season well. What they look like will between you and God, I just encourage you to make your end result growing in charity and love. Loving your spouse better, your kids better, your parents better, your people better, your God better. If you fail, go to Confession. Pick yourself up, and keep moving forward. Step by step. I know I will.

What Lent will be like around here.

I don’t want to add another program, course, or thing to do on your Lenten plate. But I do want to be a fruitful place to land should you need help walking with God. The narrow way is hard enough without extra noise.

That being said, I want to walk you through one of the most powerful books I have ever read on the intersection of REAL life and faith. This little book was my companion during Mike’s time on hospice, it was my daily bread. It brough me comfort, hope, peace, and abandonment to God’s Will. It paved the way for the resurrections that occurred afterwards. It still remains one of my most referenced books I own, one I speak of often here. And it’s so easy to read and digest.

(If you’ve been around a while, remember the books studies we did over on the Gram?? Those were fun.)

The book is called “Trustful Surrender to Divine Providence.” You can get it here on Tan Books.

(You can also jump on Amazon to look through Table of Contents)

Providentially enough, there are 5 chapters and there are 5 weeks before Holy Week. If you are a full subscriber, I will be leading you through a meditation and discussion of each chapter. Our reading and discussion schedule will look like this:

Week 1: Part 1, Chapter 1: The Will of God Made and Governs All Things.

Discussion: 3/12

Week 2: Chapter 2: The Great Advantages to be Gained From Entire Conformity to the Divine Will

Discussion: 3/19

Week 3: Chapter 3: The Practice of Conformity to the Will of God

Discussion: 3/26

Week 4: Part II, Chapter 4: Trustful Surrender to Divine Providence

Discussion: 4/2

Week 5: Chapter 5: Exercise of Conformity to Divine Providence

Discussion: 4/9

I cannot wait to dive back into this book. It is gold. It is practical gold. Come join me!

I will also continue writing letters about life and get back to my Weekly Snapshot. I’ve been praying a lot about the direction of this space, and I think I’m continuing to refine what I’m supposed to write about.

With that, I’m off to start prepping for Fat Tuesday. Feast then famine then feast again. Gotta love life!

Love, Kristine Nicole

~~~

PS: some other letters that will help you this Lent

Resilience in Action. The art of showing up when life gets hard.

An essential truth for life. The maxim and motto I’ve adopted to make sure I’m where I want to be.